#2 Question the way you clean your ass

So far in my 20s, I've been blessed with entrepreneurial experiments.

Starting a web design agency with friends as freshmen.

Co-founding an AI-apparel startup (= dropshipping) with a small pre-seed funding in Singapore.

Trying to gain 'freedom' with freelancing.

I had a chance to work with fun, ambitious and talented people.

While I deeply enjoyed the entrepreneurial process of creating something out of nothing and learned a ton, I started to quickly identify some glaring issues with my motivations that many founders may relate to.

I was fixing other people's money issues that I did not care about.

I was trading solely my time for money while trying to become rich.

I was building products I would not use (investors were excited).

At the same time as I was trying to build these businesses, I tried to be a top student, doing extracurriculars and being a fun guy at the parties.

I ended up in a state where I felt like I was half-assing everything and not doing anything up to my standards with true craft and care.

I was trying to build something of my own but at the same time, spending a tremendous amount of energy in things that my social conditioning wanted.

Unsurprisingly, this lack of focus came with consequences:

• I was stressed and anxious.

• My self-confidence depended on external validations.

• I was not where I wanted in terms of health & physique.

• I lacked energy, clarity and libido.

• I was taking lackluster care of the most important relationships I have in life.

Still, to society I was doing so amazing that I even believed it myself.

During my exchange studies in Singapore, from partying and the desperation of hangovers and meaningless sex, I slowly started to wake up to my situation.

I remember going to football training after a night out and feeling like I was about to get a heart-attack after a few sprints.

I was 24 years old.

Sure, we are not talking about anything too dramatic or a near-death experience here.

But for some reason this sparked a pivotal transformation in my life.

I cut back on drinking, quick dopamine hits and began to question even the smallest details in my life. I started playing with questions:

"Mondays suck" – do they?

Am I really destined to consume all my energy to bs meetings, pretending I care?

What would I do if I was the first human on the planet but had access to modern luxuries? Without conditioning, without culture, without identities and egos, without timelines, systems and processes I'm told to follow.

What would a five-year-old me do with my today's skills and knowledge?

What are the emotions I want to feel every single day?

What experiences and connections bring me inner joy?

For 20 years of my life I tortured myself with toilet paper when a bidet was all this time right in front of me.

I intend not to repeat this with things I'm supposed to do 8-16 hours a day.

Questioning every single detail from my surroundings, culture to my own "unique" ideas has been the best life hack to start living a life that feels fulfilling.

It may look stupid, crazy, or even lead to "mistakes" that don't make sense.

But those are necessary mistakes to learn to build a life of your own; what I believe to be a much more rewarding journey than performing a pre-tested path, repeating the same mistakes that have already been made, and winning races you never wanted to participate in.

Next – Founding Note #3: Build Success without destroying yourself in the process